Sweeeet Gift Ideas For Your Valentine

You know that I like giving the gift of gift giving ideas. And these are just for you, to get you through Valentines Day.



Cinna Minimes

Know an Austin Powers enthusiast? Give the gift of B-level comedy (the kind everyone likes) in the form of B-level sweets. Come on, you remember Cinnamon Toast Crunch right? It was a breakfast cereal box office smash! And I know that some of you watched Gold Member and thought, “That Minime… I could just eat him.”

CocoYoko Ono

Still pissed at Yoko for ruining your life when she broke up the Beatles? Lord knows I am [*shakes fist in the air, angrily screaming "Yooooookooooo, you've won this battle but the war has just begun!*]. Well, it’s time to get back at that beeeotch. Eat her head, melt her down and pour her on strawberries [did you know that she HATES strawberries? Why do you think she broke the Beatles up? It was that Strawberry Fields Forever song... she never forgave Paul]. There’s nothing more loco than eating a coco Yoko.

This is war, Yoko! And I know how much you hate that!

Bachs of Chocolate

Need a highbrow treat for a symphony enthusiast? Look no further! Bachs of Chocolate are the answer. Let them close their eyes and listen to the celebrated Toccata and Fugue in D Minor while nibbling Bach’s white chocolate ear. Allow me to suggest a pairing of the Cello Suites with dark chocolate, and perhaps the Sonatas and Partitas for violin solo with milk chocolate Bach.

Please treat lightly while listening to St. Matthew Passion. I won’t be held responsible for any unexpected Bachgasms.